February 2011
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“If I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.”
– (via coloross)
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Esperanza Spalding wins best new artist?
This is a joke right? How could she possibly have prepared an acceptance speech?
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My position going into the night
(on Hollywood Stock Exchange - HSX.com)
Best Album: (20000) Need You Now - Lady Antebellum +20000 Recovery - Eminem (20000) Teenage Dream - Katy Perry (20000) The Suburbs - Arcade Fire
Best New Artist: (20000) Esperanza Spalding (20000) Florence and the Machine +20000 Justin Beiber (20000) Mumford and Sons
Best New Record: (10000) Fuck You - Cee Lo Green (20000) Need You Now - Lady...
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katie: what are the odds i would just die of happiness if i was at the grammys?
me: very good. you'd be completely speechless the whole time. you couldn't even talk to gregg gillis (of girl talk) at a sandwich shop.
katie: yeah, that's true
me: you'd be in the bathroom throwing up from anxiety within the first 30 minutes.
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Guitar Hero is done →
Much much more on this later.
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A "Dear Friend"
The following exchange occurred over gchat/aim between a friend of mine ("me") and a friend of his that he has not heard from in a few years ("mmm1203"). My buddy sent it to me and told me I could share it with you guys. The exchange is just priceless. Enjoy.
mmm1203: hi
are u there
me: hey mer
what're you doing on aim?
mmm1203: not to good
me: what?
what's wrong?
mmm1203: did i tell u i was going to london
me: no
how/when
?
mmm1203: i went on a short vacation
the bad thing is that i was mugged yesterday
me: oh no!
are you ok?
are you still there
?
mmm1203: i was not hurt
but they took my phone crd and money
i mean my cc
me: well
both replaceable
unlike body parts
so, good you weren't hurt
mmm1203: i thank God i was not real hurt but my neck hurt abit
i was wondering if you could help me out
me: what do you need?
mmm1203: i need like 2500usd
i dont no if you can help me out
i will surely pay back
me: surely
i'm not sure if i can do that much
but i can help
how would you want me to get you the money?
mmm1203: so what can you help me with
me: well
i just got paid last friday
so i could probably get you at least $0.15
mmm1203: what
me: sorry, $0.015
mmm1203: omg chris what are you talking about
me: is my math bad?
mmm1203: cant really get what you meant
me: you're right, i think i was unclear
mmm1203: all you need is to send it via western union
me: maybe if you were to send me $15,000 i could send you the millions of dollars i have coming as soon as my friend a nigerian prince sends me my half of the money he has tied up in his old country
wait, go to the corner of oxford and davies street
look for our burly friend Federico
if he can verify your identity, he will give you money
otherwise you can get your scum of the earth ass beaten into the ground as you so justly deserve
hello?
my dear dear friend?
are you still there?
mmm1203: yes
me: i feel terrible about the things i said
can i have the wire instructions so i can send you money?
i feel so badly i want to send you 5000usd instead of the 2500usd you were hoping for
mmm1203: thank you
me: omg, you're not going to believe this!
i just went to the ATM to see how much money i can send you
and i just got mugged too!
mmm1203: yes
oh
me: now i can only give you 1284usd because that's all i have left
is that ok>?
mmm????
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